Well, we've been out of cyber range for ten days, most recently scaling ridges and yomping through rivers on the semi-dormant volcanic island of Kolombangara in the Solomon Islands. This Jurassic landscape is stunning in the mist and rain. But can all the Sir Arthur Conan Doyle-style scenery in the world really compare to Ken's Cafe and Green Street?
The big surprise is that we've only bought one Bolton player during my radio silence, Joey O'Brien. Why not just bid for the whole squad, Big Sam? Boa has been deselected and Spence has surprisingly been loaned to Bristol City again. And we still to seem to have Super Scotty.
We're currently stranded in Gizo due to inclement weather and, like most other temporary expatriates, I'm longing for Radio Five Live and the score from Upton Park. Even Nigel's football trivia facts might be welcome. As Rupert Brooke might have put it:
And does the clock still stand at half past three?
And has Matt started swearing at the referee?
Surely this season has to be better than the Grant-maintained debacle of 2010-11... Irons!
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